Neymar’s Gonna Fit in Real Well over at Barca

slide_305488_2626238_freeReuters: Brazil have defended their star striker Neymar against accusations of diving and said Uruguay’s attempts to discredit him ahead of Wednesday’s Confederations Cup semi-final were a transparent attempt to influence the referee.

Brazil beat Uruguay 2-1 Wednesday in the semifinals of the Confederations Cup, a warm-up tournament for next year’s World Cup. And the soon-to-be Barcelona striker, who scored a goal in each of the team’s three wins in the group stage, played a part in both goals at the Mineirao Stadium. But on Tuesday, Uruguay defender Diego Lugano accused Neymar of being too soft, saying, “he can drop to the ground and fool the referees, and the rivals.”

I’ll admit that this guy has been an absolute stud during the Confederations Cup. In the 4 matches played so far, he has had 3 goals and 2 assists and has arguably been the key difference maker in all 4 games.  His brilliant set piece in the 86th minute to Paulinho turned out to be the game winner which sent them to the Confederations Cup Final where they will be facing off with the winner of today’s semi-final bout between Spain and Italy. Below are his highlights from yesterdays match.

Guy was literally an insane setup man yesterday and if it we’re for him we might have Uruguay in the finals. Now, with that being said. The guy is an absolute clown when it comes to his sideshow antics which will certainly make him an even bigger star at a club like Barcelona. It’s like they reward chippy, chirping, lil’ bitchness attitudes. For example:

Neymar chirping and blowing a kiss to Uruguay defender Alvaro Gonzalez in the first few seconds of the above highlight. Below is a more clear shot of the arrogant little bastard courtesy of Yahoo! Sports. Can we imagine him doing this to someone like Skrtel or Vidic (literally the same guy). He wouldn’t have a spleen. Now lets all cross our fingers and pray that by some miracle, he is playing against whatever club Joey Barton lands at next season; he will literally be blind after Barton puts out 5 cigarettes on his eyelids during the match.

And then there’s the dive of all dives. Yesterday, in the 89th minute, Neymar decided to get his Mckayla Maroney on (ps when will she be 18??) and give the fans a real show with this insanely acrobatic flop:

And then the internet trolls took their best shot at it, and I couldn’t be happier with what they came up with:


Needless to say he will be a perfect fit for the dive happy, always bitching yet always scoring Barcelona side.

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